We meet, we fall in love, we are obsessed with one another, we might get married, and it will always be like this, right? Erm…not so much.
At the beginning we have hormones helping us, we have the excitement of the unknown fueling our fire.
Esther Perel quotes her colleague (unknown) as having a formula ‘attraction + obstacle = excitement’ so it makes perfect sense that the beginning feels like this.
What that does not have to mean is that your love and passion ebbs away. What it absolutely can mean is that it deepens and grows. How?
The hormones at the beginning are a springboard, after that, it is about effort…sexy?? Yeah It can be.
Paying attention to each other, prioritizing each other, even when you don’t feel like it, maybe especially when you don’t feel like it.
Our couple’s therapist once said to me, when you are feeling disconnected from your husband, go give him a full body hug. It works!
So, plan ways that you have can recreate that feeling from the beginning, here are 10 practical ideas for.
- Picnic in the park: Pack a cozy blanket, some delicious snacks, and enjoy a leisurely afternoon
together. - Movie night at home: Create a cozy atmosphere with blankets, popcorn, and your favourite movie
or maybe check out some ethical porn together? - Take a scenic hike: Explore nature together and enjoy the beauty of the outdoors
- Cooking date: Choose a recipe you both love. Then eat together, maybe eat off each other if you
feel adventurous! - Board game night: Get a board game, a pack of cards even. It can be PG or you can make it sexy
with the winner picking your next sex position or make it strip poker maybe? - DIY spa day: Create a relaxing atmosphere at home with face masks, massages, and soothing
music. Pamper each other and unwind. - Explore a local museum or art gallery: Discover new art and culture together, discussing your
favourite pieces and sharing your thoughts. - Volunteer together: Find a local organization or charity and spend a day giving back to the
community. - Take a dance class: Whether it’s salsa, ballroom, or even a fun hip-hop class, dancing together can
be a playful and romantic experience. - Have a game night with friends: Invite friends over for a fun-filled evening. Sometimes seeing
each other in a fun and relaxed atmosphere with your peeps can remind you what you love or fancy
about each other.
If you require therapeutic support to create the relationship you dream of, reach out to book a
Discovery Session with our Founder, Tracy Proud.
